Is this Guy for Real? [Pinch, Pinch]

Last night I was struck... dumbfounded, speechless, just plain stupefied. LM is quite a fellow. Our first "official" date this past Sunday was amazing/wonderful.

Brief recap: tele lessons w/LM taking action shots and being a lodge bunny while I tore it up on the mountain, getting ready for dinner, great dinner, then flick. Too bad I happened to see the old roomie at the theater; but seeing T-dawg cancelled out that negative :-) Sunday was followed by picking up a flick (Eulogy - kicked total ASS) and dinner at the Westside. A dull bulb led to candlelight dinner on my poor damaged dining room table. Good times...

Oh, almost forgot that I heard from Blue Suede Coat while at work on VD. Interesting cat... also interesting that every time I get into something "good", someone from the past just HAPPENS to turn up. ALWAYS happens.

Anywho, this week was just cur-razy with work so LM and I barely chatted until last night. K, for those who are hard of heart... this is going to get pretty gushy, so can't say I didn't provide a cautionary warning :-)

Summary:
LM called me last night while I was working at the ol' mountain. I was surprised to hear from him and it was actually a treat - see how EASY it is to please a girl :-) So... he asked if I was busy or if I could talk. Last night was pretty dead, so I had PLENTY of time to chatter. Right as he's asking the question, someone starts to walk into the shop and I was about to say, "Nevermind, I gotta go... I'll have to call you back" but the words got caught in my throat as I saw the entrant: LM! He drove ALL the way up the mountain to see me because we hadn't talked or seen much of each other during the week. [Sigh] Isn't that the SWEETEST ever in the history of the WORLD?!? But wait, it gets even SWEETER (Warning Continued: It's not too late to move to another web site).

He asked if I had eaten and OF COURSE I had just finished a grilled ham and cheese sandwich. I said we could still go to the lodge and chat for a bit and he said, "No, I brought stuff" indicating his backpack. He brought 4 containers of fruit (strawberries, kiwis, oranges, necterines), a caramel/fudge dip for the fruit, plates, plastic forks and napkins. At this point, I could not talk. SERIOUSLY... that is soooo impossible for me to be speechless; not only that, my face kept growing hot so I know I was blushing like a cur-razy foolio.

Ended up closing shop early and we headed down the mountain for a late night drink. I drove up last night (he thought I would have taken the van), or he would have taken me down the mountain.

To this date, the hugs have been cozy and incredible. I'm really enjoying this slow pace and find myself constantly pleased at how thoughtful he is AND just plain amazing :-)

Elle the AMAZING Belle
I am purposely avoiding the documentation of my feelings concerning Elle's departure of this wonderful town. [I prefer to shed tears in solitude and document after she leaves so we don't have to face each other as bawling fools - we gots to be STRONG women!] I am in a TOTAL state of denial right now.

BUT, I will say that I am TOTALLY stoked to go on a kickass Road Trip with this amazing chicky to ol' Chica town. Her man (the boy who I'm grudgingly handing my woman over to - what can I say, he's a cool cat and seems deserving of my girl's attention :-)) purchased my return ticket back from Chica town. It must be raining AWESOME men right now because it seems my girls and I are getting hit with the drops :-) CHICA TOWN OR BUST BABY!! I plan to document the trip with the lovely digi cam and download picts nightly on the ol' laptop... Nothin' like nerdin' it up on a road trip :-)

PermaGrin

It's Monday... [blink] It's Friday
It's Monday... [blink] It's Friday
It's Monday... [blink] It's Friday

It's sooo cur-razy how fast time seems to be passing by! Work seems to be my life lately, but other areas of my life seem to somehow be blooming in the midst of all the chaos :-)

The tele lessons on Sunday kicked TOTAL arse... I'm still a major newby, but being outside and trying new adventures in the snow totally gets my heart a'pumpin. Also attended 2 evenings of the Banff film festival - wow, such amazing feats that people accomplish. I will say I love the "land" stuff a lot more than the water. I'm not a water person; so I didn't pop a bone with the rest of the whitewater enthusiasts when we saw a couple kayaking films. Jon Muir's trek across Australia had to be my fave. I was so pissed that the most heart-breaking part of the film occurred RIGHT when I went to break the seal for the evening. Ah well...

Okay, I'm gonna burst... I've been putting it off but... I've been wearing a total permagrin for the past 3 days... ever since I found out the conclusive evidence that the object of my twitterpated/smitten kittenedness feels likewise! Here is the recorded reaction (correspondence to Miss Elle) just minutes after reading his reply to my inquiry:

Whoah, Whoah, Whoah, FUCKIN WHOAH!!! AAaaagggghhhhhh.... DUDE, DUDE, DUDE.... unFUCKINbelievable! I'm in total state of whoah that I can barely type... DAMN

Yep, that's me... that total, smitten tard to the core :-) I must say things are progressing nice, slow, and steady. We STILL have yet to hug or hold hands (brief hand/glove touching when he would help me across creeks during our hike), but we'll see. There was a bit of text flirting today - yeah, we're TOTAL nerds :-) It's pretty funny now because we like each other AND we know we like each other so when we talk in-person we're like 2 polite little kids; ah, the innocence ;-) Gee, so this is what it's like to be hanging out (not sure if it's called "dating" yet because we haven't gone on an "official" date, except if you count lunch?) with a NORMAL guy who doesn't have any damn ISSUES! Yippee for Me! Kissing all those frogs last year produced a prince this year; hehehehehe.

So... while I'm up here working tonight, he's BREWING BEER - say it ain't so :-) Let the PermaGrin times continue...

There are Times...

99.99999% of the time, I adore being who I am, feeling the way I feel, thinking the way I think, and looking the way I look; but then there are times... like tonight... when I would rather be an ugly, humorless, drone of a human being unadored and unremembered by anyone.

I was made to feel like a victim tonight and the helplessness leads me to quiet despair. There were two males who entered the shop tonight. I did not feel right about them, upon their entry. Because I was helping 2 boys, I felt the 2 men would lose interest and leave. But no... they mosied behind the counter area, and messed with the merchandise. I asked if they needed with anything and one fuck head replied, in a disgustingly low/lewd-toned voice, "Yeah, there's something you could help me with." Insinuating he had ideas of something that he needed help with. I physically shriveled and felt dreadful inside. I kept my attention on the 2 boys, praying that they wouldn't leave me alone. While the boys were chatting the 2 males went to the back of the store; so I called next door to my buddy Mase for him to come over ASAP. All he had to do was come over and read a BW while we chatted and the 2 males left. The 2 weirdos (I'm being very polite with that term - I really want to belt out every word in the book to describe the male deviant behaviors) were replaced with 3 more males.

Well, that got the ball rolling... Mase's manager came over, got on the radio and got things going so that every 5-10 minutes, somebody from patrol comes in to check on me. I despise feeling so helpless that I require people to check up on me! Sure, the company is nice; but for what!?! Why does it have to be like this? Why can't it be a wonderful utopia where 2 males can come into the store and I don't have to fear being alone with them; fear that they would attack and overcome me. Yes, perhaps the words were harmless, but the meaning behind them and the awful feeling I got just didn't sit well! I could handle one weirdo (like the one from last night), but when it comes to groups of 2 or more males, the "group factor" comes into play which could cause a "normal" guy to partake in actions he would not normally do on his own.

I'm doing a little better after the earlier "shake up." But my bladder is full and I don't want to venture out of my safety zone. I'd rather bear the pain than risk being sighted by a drunk male who decides I want his attention. I guess the "good guys", who have been stopping in to check on me, are chatting of the "cute girl". Well, at least I've met some new people up here. Gotta find a bright side to something... right :-)

Ah Sh-I-zah

My wonderful weekend came and went... all that is left is a tired/haggard girlie girl - that's me! I will not let the exhaustion and the threat of sickness get me down, no way! I'm gonna be a supa troopa :-)

Friday
Who would think Friday would be worth blogging about. Of late, Friday's consist of working and then more working; then there's the drive down the mountain at the end of the night where I quaff on a brewski w/the boys and hear them banter cruel/disgusting stories and teasing back and forth.
Par exemple:
- Dude, if you had a choice to suck on a popsicle of my semen or a popsicle of my shit... which one would you choose?
- Hey dude, have you ever got caught whacking off in the library?
Uh no...
Must be a great place to hide!
- If you and your S.O. were stranded on a desert island with no chance of rescue and she died first... would you fuck her body one last time? Nobody would know...

Anywho, This last Friday started out about the same, but ended quite differently.

I got home a bit before 12:30a (I had been up since 6a that a.m.)... that night I did not have a beer because I was so damn tired to the point that I was seeing tracers sans acid. I pet the doggie dog and drag my feet around the house as I prepare to hit the sack. What's that?!? Something seemed amiss with my beautiful, gorgeous new dining room table that I had barely had for a month.

Upon closer inspection, I see my FUCKIN' RATS ASS STINK HOLE OF A DOG, a.k.a Blue "I'm gonna KILL you when I get my hands on you" Independence, had gotten creative in my absence. The FUCKER had the audacity to chew on the corner of my gorgeous new piece and leave wood remnants on the carpet below. Later on I rationalized that he was bored and I had left him alone for quite some time. At the time of discovery, logic was very lacking. I proceeded to yell and cuss for about 20 minutes straight AND THEN I fell into my own arms on the counter and bawled helplessly. What could I do? The damage had already been done. So... today I call the store and they basically told me to fuck off and they couldn't do anything to help me. Fuckin' Dog! Seeing a returned text made me feel better :-)

Muchos Apologizos on the previous F-bomb droppage, but come ON... sometimes that is the most apropos word to properly illustrate a despairing moment.

Saturday
I tried to rest up as much as possible to make it through my "Friday" at work because I knew I would be hitting the town afterward. Made it through, swung by home to change and then hit Grainy's to meet Niss and her man (Elle and her dude totally PUSSIED out; ah well, kids who are in love...).

While out, I figured, "Hey, it's been AGES since I've been out, so I partied rockstar style. Downed some beers, threw back some shots and danced to a kickass ska band from Portland. During my party time I got 2 free tix to a show this coming Thursday, a Corona w/shot of rum and lime, a compliment on my scarf from a dude who looked like he had his eyebrows waxed (but he informed me he wouldn't wear the scarf), and a future invitation to the Flicks from a dude who said I was the type of girl who looked like she goes to see movies at the Flicks - I took that as a compliment. I ended the evening hanging with my boy NTG.

To sober up, we went to the burrito truck to order some goods but I didn't have enough cash so a trip to the ATM was warranted. But wait, I didn't close out my tab at the bar and they still had my card - DAMN! Knocked on the closed bar and they slid my card through the door (NTG plays drums there a couple times a month). Went to my ATM, then his and THEN FINALLY to the Taco Truck where he proceeded to order "ChimiYangas". Pretty damn hilarious! NTG left indefinitely for Cali Tuesday, so it was fun to hang with him for a night. Funny, I may have received plenty of male attention, but it meant nothing because my head was in the clouds in that area which leads me to...

Sunday
I got home pretty late on Sat/Sun so it was hard to crawl out of bed on Sunday. However, all the pains of getting up soon dissipated when I received a polite text (he knew I had been out late the night before, so he texted rather than risk waking me). Plans were made to go on a little excursion through the trails. A time was set and Dry Creek was the trail of choice.

I haven't come up with an appropriate name for him yet - Hot Geek, Lord Merlin (LM)... - but it will come. Anywho, we hit the trails with Fuck-O dog for a 3.5 hour hike. It was GORGEOUS outside and the company was wonderful as well. It is so EASY to be around him! The conversation flows and we always have a great time whether it be attending a lecture, hiking, or having a meal together... Obviously (even though I'm trying to restrain), I'm a smitten kitten; twitterpated every time I hear his voice, see him, or receive an email. There are soooo many little things I could gush about: he's a TOTAL geek, he's a beer connoisseur (he drank a bit of water to clear his palate before tasting my beer) and he brews his own, he rock climbs, he mountain bikes, he & his roommate have made sushi... blah blah blah. We'll see, I don't wanna jinx shizzle. I also need to confirm some MINOR details before I jump in full force (we haven't even hugged yet). Who da thunk it?!? I get a second job to avoid dudes (along with other reasons) and the one, who I've had fond thoughts of for a while, seems to feel likewise :-)
Bring it Baby... Let the GOOD TIMES roll...